Funny SMS in Hindi


Dekha tujhe to rooh khush ho gayi, Ek kami thi vo bhi puri ho gayi, Pagal hain vo log jo kehte hain ki, Chimpanzi ki aakhri nasal kahin kho gayi!!

Shaam hote hi ye Dil udaas hota hai Toote khwaboo ke siwa kuch na pass hota hai Tumahri yaad aise waqt bohat aati hai Bandar jab koi aas-paas hota hai..

Ek ladki thi diwani si, sunder si lambi si, Nazrein jhukake sharmake galion se guzra karti thi latak matak chalti thi, aur kaha karti thi, Bartan Lelo Bartan?.

Hai tu agar mera dilbar, Hai tu agar mera dilbar, To aaj ke lunch ka bill tu bhar

Khush rahe tu sada yeh dua hai meri Teri premika hi ban jaaye bhabhi teri

Abhi abhi to pyaar ka computer kiya hai chaaloo
Aab main dil ki hard disk pe aur kitni files daaloo

Apne chehare se ruswaai ka error to hatao
Ai jaaneman apne dil ka password to batao

Woh to hum hain jo aap ki chahat dil main rakhte hain
Warna aap jaise kitney hi softwares bazaar main bikte hain

Roz raat ko aap mere sapne main aate ho
Mere pyar ko mouse bana ke ungaliyon pe nachaate ho

Tere pyar ka email mere dil ko Lubhataa hai
Par beech main tere baap ka virus aataa hai

Aur karvaaoge humse kitnaa intezaar
Hamaare dil ki site pe kabhi enter to maro yaar

Apni insult ka badalaa dekhna main kaise loonga
Jaaneman tere baap ko Shift Delete kar doonga

Aap jaiso ke liye dil ko cut ker diya karte hai
Warna baaki cases main to copy paste kiya karte hai

Aapka hasnaa aap ka chalnaa aap ki woh style
Aapke adaaon ki hamne save hai kar li file

Makhi aur Machar

Machar aur Makhiki ho gayi shadi.
Pehli hi raat se ho gayi machar ki barbadi,
kehta hai ki meri kismat hi khoti hai,
makhi raat ko goodnight lagake soti hai.

What a Women Want

6″-6.2″ jis ki height ho,
jeans dheeli magar body tight ho.
biwi ka har nakhra uthaye,
itna mizaaj us ka light ho.
HUSBAND AISA APNA BRIGHT HO……..
uff tak na kare itna quite ho,
dinner banaye wo jab bhi romantic night ho.
shopping ker k jab bhi aaoon,
bolay,”tum kitni nice ho”.
HUSBAND AISA APNA BRIGHT HO…….
hamesha jo haar maan jaye,
jab bhi kabhi fight ho.
saas sasur se agar karoon koi baat,
bole begum tum hi bus right ho.
HUSBAND AISA APNA BRIGHT HO…….

Arz Kiya Hai….
Na woh inkaar karti hai
Na woh inkaar karti hai
KAMBAKHT mere hi sapno mein aakar
Mere dost se pyaar karti hai.

Jab Jab gire Baadal, Teri Yaad aayi
Jhoom ke barsa Saawan, Teri Yaad aayi
Bheega main,lekin phir bhi teri Yaad aayi
Kyon na aaye teri yaad?
Tune jo chatri ab tak nahi lautai…

Lal diwar par chune se likha tha ghalib ne
Lal diwar par chune se likha tha ghalib ne
Yahan likhna mana hai.

Unki gali ke chakkar kaat kaat kar,
Kutte bhi hamare yaar ho gaye,
Wo to hamare ho na sake,
Hum kutton ke sardar ho gaye…
Jab dekha unhone tirchhi nazar se,
to hum madhosh ho gaye,
Par jab pata chala ki nazare hi tirchhi hai,
to hum behosh ho gaye…

Arz kiya hai, Door se dekha to santra tha, pass jake
dekha to santra tha,
cheel ke dekha to bhi santra tha, Khake dekha to bhi
santra tha.
Wah kya santra tha

Macchar ne jo kata… dil main mere junoon tha.
Khujli hui itni… dil be sukoon tha.
Pakada to chod diya yeh soch kar ki….
sale ki ragon main apna hi khoon tha!

Khuda kare tera mobile kho jaye.
Mile mujhe aur mera ho jaye.
Karu SMS ladkion ko naam tera aae.
Maar tujhe pade
Aur kalejamera thanda ho jae.

Jab Jab tum angdai lete ho dam hamara nikal jata hai.
Aye Jalim Deodrant lagane me tumhara kya jata hai ?

unki gali se guzar rahe the kya ittefaq tha,
unkigali se guzar rahe the kya ittefaq tha,
unhoon ne phool phainka par gamla bhi saath tha !

Ek din, main Delhi pahuncha,
Station pe ek coolie se bahar jane ka rasta pooncha.
Coolie ne kaha: “Bahar jaake poocho.”

Maine khud hi rasta dhundh liya,
Bahar jaake taxiwale se pooncha:
“Bhai saab Lal Kile ka kitna loge?”
Jawab mila: “Bechna nahi hai.”

Taxi chod, maine bus pakad li,
Conductor se pooncha: “Ji, kya mein cigarette pi
sakta hoon?”
Wo gurrra kar bola: “Hargiz nahi, yaha cigarette
pina mana hai.”
Maine kaha: “Par wo janab to pi rahe hai!”
Phir se gurrrraya: “Usne mujhse pooncha nahi hai.”

Lal Kile pahucha, hotel gaya.
Manager se kaha: “Mujhe room chahiye, satvi manzil
pe.”
Manager ne kaha: “Rahane ke liye ya koodne ke liye?”
Room pahucha, waiter se kaha: “Ek paani ka gilas
milega?”
Usne jawab diya: “Nahi sahab, yahan to saare kanch
ke milte hain.”

Hotel se nikla, dost ke ghar jaane ke liye,
Raste me ek sahab se pooncha:
“Janab, ye sadak kaha ko jaati hai?”
Janab hans kar bole: “Peechle bees saal se dekh
rahan hoon,
Yahi padi hai… kahin nahin jaati.”

Dost ke ghar pahucha, to mujhe dekhte hi chownk
pada,
Usne poocha: “Kaise aana hua?”
Ab tak to mujhe bhi aadat pad gayi thi,
Maine bhi jawab diya: “Train se.”

Meri aaobhagat karne ke liye dost ne apni biwi se
kaha:
“Areeee sunti ho… mera dost pehli baar ghar aaya
hai,
Uuse kuch taja taja khilao.”
Sunte hi bhabhiji ne ghar ki sari
khidkiya aur darwaje khol diye.
Kaha: “Taji hawa kha lijiye.”

Dost ne phir se baday pyar se biwi se kaha:
“Areeee sunti ho, inhe jara apna chalis saal purana
aachar to dikhana.”
Bhabiji ek baatli me rakha aachar le aayi.
Maine bhi apnapan dikhate hue bhabiji se kaha:
“Bhabhiji, aachar sirf dikhayengi, chakhayengi
nahi?”
Bhabiji ne taak jawab diya: “Yuhi agar sab ko
chakhati
To aachar chalis saal purana kaise hota?”

Thodi der baad dekha, bhabiji apne potey ko sula rah
thi,
Saath me lori bhi ga rahi thi:
“Diploma so ja, diploma so ja.”
Lori soon mein hairan hua aur dost se poocha:
“Yaar, ye diploma kya hai?”
Dost ne jawab diya: “Mere grandson ka naam,
Beti bambai gayi thi, diploma lene ke liye
Aur saath mein ise le aayi,
Isiliye hamne iska naam Diploma rakh diya.”
Phir maine pooncha: “Aajkal tumhari beti kya kar
rahi hai?”
Dost ne jawab diya: “Bambai gayi hai, degree lene ke
liye.”

Aapke life mein mithaas ho “Cadbury” jaise
Rounak ho “Asian Paints” jaise
Mehak ho “Axe” jaise
Tazgi ho “Colgate” jaise
Aur tension-free rahe
“Huggies” jaise!
“Happy Diwali”

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